Who is to blame?

I wonder if the period affects women mood or maybe could be the insecurities. I really don't know, like I said before I'm very touchy and I'm not patient with my family and people who are closer to me, I mean I'm not empathic  these days, and I don't  know who to blame but a week before my period I just get cranky and I want to cry all the time. Once I read in a feminist post about that blaming for your bad mood to your period is sexism, it's something that society had imposed women and they believed that, but if it's not the period, what is it? 

Maybe it's because  of fears or insecurities?  Well, first I need to calm down and find out the answer.

Bianka

Vintage obsession

When I was in my black phase I used to look for gothic fashion on the internet but something happened, I found a blog called Only Shallow written by a finnish girl who loved vintage fashion, I started to read her posts and look her outfits and I began to know more about retro fashion and vintage pieces and then a year later I had my first retro dress made by my aunt Cristina, I really love that dress, unfortunately here in Bolivia we don't have vintage stores and it's really expensive to buy outside the country.... And all I have is to look to the pictures on the different vintage shops on Etsy.

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Kiss in your souls :)

Bianka

The pictures of SASU

It's been a quiet weekend, on saturday afternoon I had an activity with my inusual kids (church students) we went to the main square of our city and had a little sermon there, then they had fun feeding the pigeons and playing with them, later we had cake at the curch. On sunday I attended church and had lunch with my family, we ate in a traditional restaurant and then we had ice cream! It was a nice moment.
Here you have some pictures.

 Saturday afternoon!

 Me and my sweet Jasmine :)

 Let's catch some pigeons!

 

This is Heine Lizz, she's one of my little monsters at church, she has a unique attitude, some people might say she is tomboy, but  she doesn't care about that because she's a lovely girl!

 

 Sunday, my brothe and I.

My mom and my brother :)

P.S. I don't know why I'm grumpy, and touchy... I really need a break out from the monotony.

Have peace and a nice week.

Bianka

Cloud tree

These days were a little bit boring and monotonous and I'm not doing nothing besides working, I'm not reading anything  and I feel empty because of that, it seems that I lost my ideas, I don't feel inspired when I don't read so today I'm going to read a tale and maybe something more, I've been feeling sick these days and I have headaches all the time and I can't breathe well, I don't want to get sick...

But you know what? Not everything in this week  was boring, since a while I was chatting with a special person for me and finally we could talk by skype it was a nice chat, at the beginning I was nervous and I was smiling all the time but it was good to see him and listen to him , he lives in another country right now but  it's interesting the fact that we still in contact notwithstanding the time and space.

Watch and listen to this lovely song by Piers Faccini called Black Rose, I love the lyrics.


Bianka

I'm not charming

Yesterday I found, in my mom's things, a course book called "How to be charming"  It was a christian book, written by a pastor's wife I think... As I was reading that book I realized that I didn't fit in any of the canons that a "charming woman" had suppose to behave... The most interesting thing about that book is that how the feminity of a woman  was portrayed; the book said that a charming woman shouldn't be angry, should be well dressed, should smile all the time and many sexist things. My sister, as a joke, told me that I should follow all those advices that  were in the book so I could be more femenine... Well  I think I'm girly, and I don't care what a book says about feminity, a woman creates her own feminity and the false idea of feminity that mass media portrait is a bunch of lies.

Every woman is beautiful, unique and amazing. You just have to believe in you!

Here's a picture of me. All of these years I've been complaining about my nose, thinking about a cosmetic surgery but now I realize that I wouldn't be the same if I fix my nose, it's part of me and I love it!

God bless you :)

Bianka

A picnic desire

I've been thinking about going to a picnic in  the mountains, specifically in a place called Chilimarca, it's beautiful, surrounded by many eucalyptus trees and you can see a river, unfortunately there is no time and no companions, my friends are busy living their lives hahahahha.  Today, I was reading one of my favorite blog by Jessica Silversaga, she had a lovely picnic time as I could see on her pictures, she is an amazing photographer and she seems so sublime loving every moment of her life, read her blog, you'll love it as I do.

So as Jessica's blog was my inspiration about writing this post I will show you some picnic pictures, which shows the way that I want to have one.

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Smile between confusion...

Bianka

2005

In 2005 I used to wear black clothes and listen to good metal bands, I used to attend metal concerts with my friend Dav. It was a nice moment even though  I used to be angry all the time and I used to curse most of the times... Which sometimes it wasn't good but I don't regret of that moment, it's a part of my life.

Here you have a playlist that I used to listen in 2005.



Bianka

Fooling around

When my sister and I are bored we start to watch movies or take pictures of ourselves so here you have some pictures with our goofy faces... Hahaha
I love my sister and I like spending time with her, but sometimes I want to kill her!! hahahha that's how sisters love works :)

Have a nice week! And eat a lot of vegetables! 

Bianka

Asombrada

I've been feeling mad and silent these days wich sometimes is good, not being mad being silent to appreciate every moment of life. I like my part time job, it's interesting teaching people a new language but sometime you'll see mean people in your life. I still don't understand why people underestimate you because of how you look. There are two ladies who are students of mine but they are sometimes mean with me because they tell me how to do my work and that's really annoying... But I will show them that I'm the teacher  and I know what I'm doing...

I leave you with a song that I love very much by  one of the most wonderful bolivian bands: El Parafonista. Hope you like it.

Bianka

Busy Busy

My friend Marisol had a dog whose name was Busy... And today I remember the name of my friend's pet when I was walking to everywhere. I've got a part time job as an English teacher in an institute, I hope to last in this job until a find another one, wish me luck, I need to save money for a plan that I will talk about later.

Watch and listen this video by Apocalyptica, I'm obssesed  with this song these days.




Have fun

Bianka

Hard times for dreamers

I imagine how would it be to travel to Europe in these moments, it's summer there and I really want to be in Finland... Why? I want to see the midnight sun, the forests, listen to the concerts.... I know I'm a dreamer... Unfortunately dreamers are passing through bad situations. I found this magazine that I really liked to read.

 Kisses.  


Bianka

After six years

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When I was 20 a friend of mine read for me a passage of a book called Rayuela by the argentinian writer Julio Cortázar, it seemed very interesting  but I didn't pay attention to that until now, six years later I started to read it and it was a unique experience having read the same passage that my friend read for me, I remember very well, it was a friday night, we were sitting in the cafeteria of the university, we were four, my friend Roberto, Alejandra (the one who read the book), a girl that I didn't like it and me, the lights were fews and I remember my book's friend, it was lined by a beautiful lavander color paper, we were just ten minutes because it was late and I was worrying about not taking the bus early. Oh...How many simple memories of a lovely time.

And I'm in the first chapter of the book and I love it, I wonder if magicians are part of a human being's eternity or just part of single wonderful moment.


Bianka

Shave or not to shave?

Today I read an article about a woman who hates to shave his body, she explains that shaving is something imposed by the beauty industries. Every decade a new body prototype is promoted in the mass media and all women are dominated by this situation. Have you wondered if you shave your legs, your armpits or other place in your body for your own welfare or because of the society presure?  What beauty is for you?  Women who don't shave their body are beautiful? Think about it...

I like to shave my legs and my armpits but the bikini part no thanks and if my boyfriend (I don't have one yet, perhaps in the future, who knows) bothers me about shaving my body I can send him to hell, just simple like that :)

If you want to read some articles about not shaving your body, you have some here:

what to expect when you stop shaving 

Why I don't shave my legs

Bianka

All your lights and neon lights are old

Yesterday was my dear friend Marisol's wedding, I was her maid of honor. It wedding was nice, I danced and talked to my university friends. But I wasn't happy I wanted something special for my friend, I used to think that she and I would travel around the world and live intersting things but it didn't happen, she got married with a man who contributes to her insecurity, she got pregnant so she got married, but things happen for a reason and I just have to support her in her decisions however I'm praying for her to have more confidence with herself and make her dreams come true.

By the way today I've been thinking in a weird situation that happened today, and I just realized that nothing would be like before, I'm not naive and I know clearly the situation of these moments, I don't have hope of any sentimental thing.

I like this picture poorly focused from the wedding.

Blessings for this week.

Bianka

Pale face

Tonight I had a nice chat with my former church students, they are all grown up and they are teachers on sundays at my church, it was a nice chat, I look at them like those naughty kids who used to scream and tell me everything about their lives. Tonight one of them thanked me because I was like a friend with them and also because I was the first person who gave it to him his first Cannibal Corpse cd, I was 19 when I was their teacher, I used to wear black clothes and I used to make them listening to good metal bands. Tonight I felt a little bit old and nostalgic, I'm not that younger as I was in 2006... Anyway, it was a nice time listen to them telling me about their lives and their experiences.

Eat garlic!

Bianka

Walk like a lunatic

So, I realized that I'm a facebook addict and I'm wasting  my time, I'm not reading anything, I'm not writing my tales and I'm becoming lazy, that's the worst of this situation. I'm loosing hope that I would find a job that makes me happy....
What's going to happen these next days?  We'll see....

And no,  I don't  have any hopes of anything...

Sexy Butt Romping, Hip Gyrating, Soul Sound Playlist For My Hot Momma Salina from HeadBands on 8tracks Radio.

Listen to this mix, it's very amusing in cleaning times.

Bianka