Jarsssss

These days are a little bit warm so I'm looking for  jars to make interesting drinks, for me it's very amusing drink in jars :D.

I'm feeling good, pretty optimistic about laboral situation, if I can't find a job, I can make one, it's the best idea.

Enjoy the pictures of mason jar drinks

 

 

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Bianka

By myself

Today I feel a little bit nervous because my right hand was trembling, I got scared when I was holding a glass of water and the trembling was still in my hand, it was horrible I started to cry and I tought about many things... So I started to think what would it be if something happens to me, if I have a serious illness and I stay like a vegetal, what would happen? Some people look for life quantity but I look for quality of life. I won't be the same if I can't talk, can't write can't do anything by myself, I prefer euthanasia and that's my choice and my decision. I wouldn't like to tie to any person to help me to live, however, I would take care if something happen to one of my family members or Mister G. I think that's love... Don't you think?


Yes, I know I'm a fatalist person but then I try not to worry about anything. I'm feeling a lot of pressure about the job, I don't know if that school is going to accept my petition to be an ESL teacher but God knows what is going to happen, I can't waste my time going to a place where they don't even know what job is for me...

Bianka

Comic post

Read these interesting comics that I found in deep - dark - fears. Sometimes I think some fatalist thoughts like I cut my mouth while I'm drinking a glass of water or other things... hahahahha. That blog is very amusing, I really like it and some of the situations are a bit similar to my thoughts!!
Hope you like it,

Comics source: here

Don't be afraid, you have the power inside you, I know it sounds like a cliché but, it's true!!

Bianka

The essence of quietness

Yesterday I was in my bedroom, I'm still with the flu so I decided to read a book of one of my favorite Bolivian writers, Victor Hugo Viscarra, I was reading "Alcoholatum Y otros drinks"  when, my sister Yhun came to me and she started to talk and talk and I just wanted to read quietly in my bedroom, she was telling me that she had a date and the guy who is going to go out... So, I was starting to loose the patience when I see behind me another Victor Hugo Viscarra's book (Ch'aqui fulero) and I looked at her and told her "You should read this book , you're going to like it", she looked at me surprised and told me "You wanted me to read this book so I could shut my  mouth, right? And  of course I said no, I just told her that she won't get bored if she read that book, and As I know my sister told me: "Well, I'm going to read it but aloud!" She is just child eventhough she looks older than me... Hehehe. At the beginning she was making noises while she was reading but then she started to speak less and finally got involved in the essence of that book... What can I say? Victor Hugo is a magician even though he's dead, No one can surrender to his words, You live the moment, through his books he transports you to the most unwanted places in Bolivia.

"Voces vasos vacíos"

Today I've been feeling a little bit sick, I think I got a flu again... And that's bad. But before I got worse I want to show you a video by one of the most interesting bands from Cochabamba, they are Timpana and  I should say that Mister G is a former member of this band, they have an interesting concept, everyone of them are wonderful artists. So here you have a video from 2012, it was a concert in Palacio Portales, a place that promotes art and culture in Bolivia.

Hope you like it :)


Bianka

Judging

It's interesting how  contradiction would become... Today I saw that a girl that I know started to write  a blog, so I read her blog and unfortunately all I found was a contradictions of her critics, she criticizes about the facebook posts that other people do, she says that they are snobs and they depend on their parents wallets, she complains about capitalism and the revolution thoughts of some her friends. But why she doesn't look at herself? She is in one of the most expensive schools in Cochabamba, she has a car because her dad bought for her, she spends ridiculous amounts of money in clothes and she worries about her figure, she wants to be skinny like the European models... So who is hypocrit? The people whom she judges or her? 

So stop judging something that you're doing! Be the change, make revolution or don't say anything!

I laugh about that stupid contradiction.

Bianka

Birwedding day

Yesterday was my sister's birthday and my friend Fabian's wedding. I was tired about the friday party so I didn't have the enough energy to do many things, so we went to the wedding and it was a little bit awkawrd, we were my sister and I and the people who were on our table were drinking a lot of alcohol and they weren't nice with us, and they were making ethnocentric comments that I didn't like so we leave the party early then my sister wanted to go to a disco so we did but my cousin  felt sick so we returned home... Thank God, I just wanted to be in my bed and sleep!!  I'm getting older hahaha but I prefer to go to a pub have coffee or drink and then go to an indie place where I can dance freely.

Tomorrow I have a job interview, I don't have any expectations but I'm nervious it's an interesting job that I could do greatly... :)

Here's a picture of me in the wedding,

I need a camera! And I need to read many books.

Bianka

Cleaning for the party

Today is my sister's birthday party and tomorrow is my friend Fabian's wedding, I don't know what dress I'm going to use but I only know that I'm going to wear a white picture hat. I feel a little bit misanthropist I don't like to be surrounded by many people and I prefer to talk just few minutes with others... And there is a huge pressure about the job and about my life so I prefer not to talk about my future until I have everything done and have the courage to tell my family about my decision.

So here it is an Argentinian "Get Lucky" cover. It's very hilarious.


It would be a good idea if you clean the mess that is in your house hehehhe :)

Bianka

It's only my fault

Today I had a discussion with my mom she told me that I don't have a job because I'm against God, she said that feminism and anarchism represents huge sins but why? I don't understand that, the fact that I don't have a job is because of me, of my fear about everything and also because I'm not looking to the right places the job that would make me happy, but it's not someone elses' fault. These days I'm feeling a lot of presure about my philosophy of life that unfortunately it's a theory that needs to be taken to the practice, if I do what my mom or religion say I would be miserable because I would feel that I lost the battle against all I hate and I'm against... I wouldn't be happy if I follow the rules, those rules that are imposed by a system based on lies, divisions and hipocrisy... I prefer to die instead of being a puppet, of being someone who recieves orders... I only need to make my own decisions and be the author of this life.

It's up to me.

Watch this video, it's a fashion performance ( I don't know if it's the right word). It shows Rick Owens clothing designs, but the most interesting thing is that the models are not tall and skinny are just women.


Bianka

Oral History

A lovely playlist to begin a busy day. It's about to rain, here in Cochabamba :)

Indie Fall Mix from sobrey on 8tracks Radio.

Bianka

Let's wear dresses!

It's spring and my need to wear dresses is increasing, why? Well, one of the reasons of the weather that is getting warm everyday and the other is that most of my jeans are not fitting me...  I have to work out! hehehhe  But I still like my body however I need to tone my muscles and buy another jeans but, there's always a but,  I don't have enough money to pay clothes so I'm still looking for a job and make this freelancer project work but it takes long time.

Anyway, here are some beautiful dresses, skirts, bralets that I would like to wear in spring and summer:

Source here

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Source Tara Starlet

Source Adored Vintage

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Walk in the streets with an umbrella!

Bianka

Remember how to forget

Sometimes I wonder what would happen to me  in the future if I forget the words while I'm talking to someone... Sometimes I pay attention to many things and then I realize that I don't pay attention to anything, sometimes I wonder if my decisions would be alright, in the future, I'm worry about the future and I'm not doing nothing in the present, it's like I'm sleeping and the time is passing and the things are passing. I feel afraid about making mistakes in my decisions but then I think I wouldn't know if I don't try...

Today I watched a documentary about a writer called Edwin Honig, the documentary is called First cousin once removed. I really loved to watch it, Edwin Honig was always a poet eventhough he had Alzeheimer, and as you watch it you can see the reason of his disease and it was to forget things... He was a good writer, poet but he wasn't an excellent father... No one is perfect right? 

This documentary inspired me to write to comeback to my words roots, to my need to write a legacy... 

And this phrase, by Edwin Honig, was the ringing bell to wake up my inspiration: "Forget me one day, one week, one month, one year..."

Here's a poem by him and a clip of his documentary made by Alan Berliner.

To Infinite Eternity

          I

Death is closer
to infinite eternity
than life is

and each life closer
to each least breath
than the blankness of
infinite eternity itself

          II

To think blankness
rouses certain terror
and in the feeling
the sudden sense

of self responding
down to the smallest
unaided particle

of its existence
as answer to
the blankness of
sure nonexistence

          III

Then infinite eternity
may be the opposite
of felt existence

durable as any
measurably
felt time

          IV

I say hello
to myself

and to break
the terror

of nonexistence
I restore my self

to existence whatever
the consequence


Bianka