Judging

It's interesting how  contradiction would become... Today I saw that a girl that I know started to write  a blog, so I read her blog and unfortunately all I found was a contradictions of her critics, she criticizes about the facebook posts that other people do, she says that they are snobs and they depend on their parents wallets, she complains about capitalism and the revolution thoughts of some her friends. But why she doesn't look at herself? She is in one of the most expensive schools in Cochabamba, she has a car because her dad bought for her, she spends ridiculous amounts of money in clothes and she worries about her figure, she wants to be skinny like the European models... So who is hypocrit? The people whom she judges or her? 

So stop judging something that you're doing! Be the change, make revolution or don't say anything!

I laugh about that stupid contradiction.

Bianka

Birwedding day

Yesterday was my sister's birthday and my friend Fabian's wedding. I was tired about the friday party so I didn't have the enough energy to do many things, so we went to the wedding and it was a little bit awkawrd, we were my sister and I and the people who were on our table were drinking a lot of alcohol and they weren't nice with us, and they were making ethnocentric comments that I didn't like so we leave the party early then my sister wanted to go to a disco so we did but my cousin  felt sick so we returned home... Thank God, I just wanted to be in my bed and sleep!!  I'm getting older hahaha but I prefer to go to a pub have coffee or drink and then go to an indie place where I can dance freely.

Tomorrow I have a job interview, I don't have any expectations but I'm nervious it's an interesting job that I could do greatly... :)

Here's a picture of me in the wedding,

I need a camera! And I need to read many books.

Bianka

Cleaning for the party

Today is my sister's birthday party and tomorrow is my friend Fabian's wedding, I don't know what dress I'm going to use but I only know that I'm going to wear a white picture hat. I feel a little bit misanthropist I don't like to be surrounded by many people and I prefer to talk just few minutes with others... And there is a huge pressure about the job and about my life so I prefer not to talk about my future until I have everything done and have the courage to tell my family about my decision.

So here it is an Argentinian "Get Lucky" cover. It's very hilarious.


It would be a good idea if you clean the mess that is in your house hehehhe :)

Bianka

It's only my fault

Today I had a discussion with my mom she told me that I don't have a job because I'm against God, she said that feminism and anarchism represents huge sins but why? I don't understand that, the fact that I don't have a job is because of me, of my fear about everything and also because I'm not looking to the right places the job that would make me happy, but it's not someone elses' fault. These days I'm feeling a lot of presure about my philosophy of life that unfortunately it's a theory that needs to be taken to the practice, if I do what my mom or religion say I would be miserable because I would feel that I lost the battle against all I hate and I'm against... I wouldn't be happy if I follow the rules, those rules that are imposed by a system based on lies, divisions and hipocrisy... I prefer to die instead of being a puppet, of being someone who recieves orders... I only need to make my own decisions and be the author of this life.

It's up to me.

Watch this video, it's a fashion performance ( I don't know if it's the right word). It shows Rick Owens clothing designs, but the most interesting thing is that the models are not tall and skinny are just women.


Bianka

Oral History

A lovely playlist to begin a busy day. It's about to rain, here in Cochabamba :)

Indie Fall Mix from sobrey on 8tracks Radio.

Bianka

Let's wear dresses!

It's spring and my need to wear dresses is increasing, why? Well, one of the reasons of the weather that is getting warm everyday and the other is that most of my jeans are not fitting me...  I have to work out! hehehhe  But I still like my body however I need to tone my muscles and buy another jeans but, there's always a but,  I don't have enough money to pay clothes so I'm still looking for a job and make this freelancer project work but it takes long time.

Anyway, here are some beautiful dresses, skirts, bralets that I would like to wear in spring and summer:

Source here

Source here

Source here

Source Tara Starlet

Source Adored Vintage

Source here

Source here

Source here

Walk in the streets with an umbrella!

Bianka

Remember how to forget

Sometimes I wonder what would happen to me  in the future if I forget the words while I'm talking to someone... Sometimes I pay attention to many things and then I realize that I don't pay attention to anything, sometimes I wonder if my decisions would be alright, in the future, I'm worry about the future and I'm not doing nothing in the present, it's like I'm sleeping and the time is passing and the things are passing. I feel afraid about making mistakes in my decisions but then I think I wouldn't know if I don't try...

Today I watched a documentary about a writer called Edwin Honig, the documentary is called First cousin once removed. I really loved to watch it, Edwin Honig was always a poet eventhough he had Alzeheimer, and as you watch it you can see the reason of his disease and it was to forget things... He was a good writer, poet but he wasn't an excellent father... No one is perfect right? 

This documentary inspired me to write to comeback to my words roots, to my need to write a legacy... 

And this phrase, by Edwin Honig, was the ringing bell to wake up my inspiration: "Forget me one day, one week, one month, one year..."

Here's a poem by him and a clip of his documentary made by Alan Berliner.

To Infinite Eternity

          I

Death is closer
to infinite eternity
than life is

and each life closer
to each least breath
than the blankness of
infinite eternity itself

          II

To think blankness
rouses certain terror
and in the feeling
the sudden sense

of self responding
down to the smallest
unaided particle

of its existence
as answer to
the blankness of
sure nonexistence

          III

Then infinite eternity
may be the opposite
of felt existence

durable as any
measurably
felt time

          IV

I say hello
to myself

and to break
the terror

of nonexistence
I restore my self

to existence whatever
the consequence


Bianka